Wednesday Woody

"The good thing about masturbation is that you don't have to dress up for it." — Truman Capote.



"For some reason I always confuse the words 'marinate' and 'masturbate'. Maybe that's why nobody likes my cooking." — Scott E. Frank.



I used to consider myself a member of the Mile High Club until I learned that masturbating in Denver doesn't count." — Tom Sullivan.



It is called in our schools 'beastliness', and this is about the best name for it... should it become a habit it quickly destroys both health and spirits; he becomes feeble in body and mind, and often ends in a lunatic asylum." — Buy at Amazon.comRobert Baden-Powell, British soldier and founder of the Boy Scouts. Referring to masturbation.



"Compulsive masturbator on board... check your windshield wipers." — Bumper sticker.



I don't know why I did it, I don't know why I enjoyed it, and I don't know why I'll do it again." — Bart Simpson.



"We have reason to believe that man first walked upright to free his hands for masturbation." — Lilly Tomlin.